HANA TAJIMA - Inspiring Muslimah's World

http://www.stylecovered.com/

Recently, her blog had blew my mind. The best blog ever - after Hijab Style blogspot which i love to browse with. She is a Fashion Designer at her age of 23 years old...Her Style, Her Fashion, i think, really suites me...Perusing with her style made me realize that she is so simple, nice to see, creative, and vibrant...i am glad - one in a thousands had stand to shower the Muslimah's World with beautiful things..

She had reminded me to one of my childhood's ambitions wannabe list- a fashion designers as the third choice...
I was remembering that i actually have started to love fashion from the paper fashion chic...I believe friends at my age has experienced with it where it was a set of hard paper with so many cloths and we have to clip on top of a paper girl. I cried for this when i followed my mom to shops ...There was where i learned on how to mix and match the cloth and appreciating the glamorous world...

Well, I personally had my own fashion sketch published in this blog too tho!...It has been a longtime that i had discontinuing sketching for muslimah's fashions...Which i guess now, I have a bunch of ideas in my head that i need to express and share with the World!...Just wait for another boom fashion to come out!

(hmmmm...not saying that i am not glad to be an architect. My profession is perfectly suites me as becoming an architect was actually my own ability -i guess)

p/s:
For me, Hijab is not only a must as a Muslims... Wearing it, are actually comforting you, personalizing you, and yet, we feel safe under it...After so many years live in 'covered', i did not see any reasons on why should i opened it. Not just because my religion has thought me not to do so...With it also,I have successfully become a person who i wanted to be, with no prejudice, not being under estimating by other religions, still gaining money and building life or etc ...And, the best part is, i become more stylish everyday with it....(hehehe)
I personally felt down and sad with any Muslimah which once had a very nice looking with their Hijab on top, but yet choose to uncover again. Please realize that persons with covered are more outstanding and brilliant! hehehe sorry if i am too annoying..

2010 – You’ll miss it when it’s gone…

p/s: I'm still working on this page...too many stories to tell within short time..i'm stuck with july 2010...but yet, ther's nothing wrong with an earlier post publishment... happy to read!

I was driving this morning heading to meet my project team for one of our recent project in the office. I have drove with an empty thoughts, definitely away from any sound or disk joker’s mumbling through the radio. I only can hear sound of cars roaring and honking outside from my ‘vacuum’ car.

My mind was recalling throughout my whole journey since earlier 2010 year. It was drift into my mind that I could not count more on happiness. Only tears and sadness compared to; more happy and vigorous life,-except for having my 2nd baby on my own birthday last year…(yeay! One in a thousand cases!)…
Well, too many lost to people whom I love so much in my life last year. God has HIS own plan…HE leads, HE tested and HE has the power to judge people. As we breathing the air as a Muslim in HIS world, patience and passion were the priority to alive. We should know that there are no other ways to make us happy to live in HIS world except for praying and always remembering HIM as Allah the Almighty. I was reminding myself that all our belongings were only been landed to me by HIM …..

January 2010-
The chapter begins here where I do think it is important to have some general direction where we think we should head. With having a one and half year toddler at this moment, I believe, our life could be more complete with having a maid since I was 6th month pregnant at this time. At least, by having a 'paid' helpers, I shall pass out all the house works, laundries, but- minus cooking. I cooked every morning to ensure that my son could get his complete nutrition to grow up; or per Se– ‘air tangan ibu’ is important to keep he loves you more. Besides, I shall feed up my hubby before he started with his long tortures working days. And..we had one maid from Indonesia to help us… This year is the year that we 've planned to move out from our small box to start our new life at the house where we are about to buy. Landed house, with three bedrooms, two bathrooms, big kitchen definitely and within its own compound where the house is surrounded by land, plus good neighbors…So complete…I guess…

February 2010 -
This month, was alarmed me with a very bad news. Here the sadness begins… My related grandmother (my grandmother’s sister) Siti Arfah had passed away, leaves her two kids and a husband. I can not say for sure whether she died in peacefully. She was bedridden and had not been able to communicate well when we paid our visits to Alor Star’s Hospital just to see her. She had stroke for a few weeks before she’s gone. She, during her life was well known as the best baby sitter and the best ‘sambal’ with ‘nasi daun lemuni’ maker.. She seems like always had been tested by God, as her life was just to taking care of other peoples including her own mom, and her husband was also suffered with paralytic. During my childhood time, she had also taking care of me like her own daughter and i followed her wherever she goes and that’s definitely the core reasons on me and her were very closed compared to others. Despite I am sad of losing her, at the other point of view, I am also glad that her suffering has ended…May Allah bless her. Al Fatihah..

March 2010-
Earlier of March 2010, we have moved to our new house. As described before, we have more works to do to fit in a better life. Well, you name it on what a young family shall do when they move to an empty house… Not yet mentioning to complete our house with fixed furniture or et. cetera. (Tiring, money, sweating..bla..bla..bla..) Well, related to this, the old paraphrase had haunted me where, ‘pregnant mother shall not move to a new house because it will bring to a complication during delivering a baby’… WOW! Sounds creepy but I think it may true if we believe it is true…

April 2010-
Huh! This month, beside happy to wait for a new born baby, the true color of my maid reveals. She started to be weirder more than the first time she served us. She act strangely and started to be more clumsy, unfocused and dis arrangements. She can not even differentiates between dirty and clean, can’t remember to make my son’s a bottle of milk (where she stirs up cereals as Arief’s milk…what a shame when all this things happened after 5 month working with us!) we were wondering on her behavioral changes. Then, it really shocked me when we found that she had used her black magic while working with us (and using it to detain and delayed my delivery! How cruel she was!). Well,, I does not want to elaborate more since it had tear my heart into peaces and shall be no forgiveness for her from us. Well, guess what, at last, she mentioning that she does not know on how to take care of new born baby and she afraid to taking care of two kids at one time). We dare to teach but she choose to be send back…No choice, as my late father had send her home after she had really showed her true colors and she does not even wants to see my baby.

26 April 2010, I’ve celebrated my birthday at Hospital where the biggest gift I’ve received where my 2nd baby had been safely been delivered at 4.22 a.m. What a coincidence...It is Monday, as I was born on Monday too!..plus I also born at 4.52 a.m on 26th April! God knows well…As mentioned he planned everything….

my new lil' baby finally exist...Tuan Diyana Aqielah

May & June 2010 –
I've finished two months of my confinement period in JB at my parent’s house. Quite suffering when I have no helper to helps my parents to taking care of my sons. I felt pity for my late father as he was also suffering with gout while he spend more of his time by looking after of my son. Arief had turns to be more jealous with his new born mate. He even can not see while I am breast feeding Aqielah. Well, we were in the process of searching for a new baby sitter -at least to taking care of my kids before Eids. For us, the three earlier months were a critical time to ensure that the baby is well and not to give more exposure to the outside weather before we send them to a Nursery. And, we’ve found one babysitter as she was my hubby’s cousin came from Thailand. All the tiredness was relieves. We ended up in JB with small ‘Cukur Jambul Ceremony’ before we went back to start a new life with new baby and I have to start to work again.


July 2010-

the best pictures of my family..i could not find any of Abah's pictures after our last raya 2009...

My Father, Hj Ismail Bin Hj Mohamad 62, had passed away on 14th July 2010. We glad that we were able to stand with full of suffusion by his side when we have decided to let he drew his last breath. I received a call at 4.44 am on 13th July from Mama, had telling us that Abah was in ICU since 2.00 am that morning and he was suffocated with chest ache …I was numb and can not copy on what ever mama had said, as I received an emergency call during my nap time. I can’t even think straight because I just talked and laughed -(like daughters and fathers always did via phone) with him and... It was happened a night before !.For me, he sounds good and healthy even I knew that he was on his treatment for his gout and chest ache. We packed our stuff like there were no time were awaits for us to think what shall we bring to go back to JB.. All has been dumped into one big bag with all my kids stuff and our stuff into it. So mess as I can not think what we shall bring in a very short time. (Of course we definitely left over so many things when we arrived in JB).
We immediately picked up my sister at her Sterling Condo in KJ, and left for the hospital in JB, anxiously trying to get there as soon as we possibly could.. We left her husband first since he needs to report to MAS for his emergency leaves.Yeah .he is a pilot..definitely more life to be thinking off.... When we finally arrived at the Penawar Specialist Hospital right before 9 am, I met with my family and my dad was lying on the bed. I’ve cried a lot but luckily he still recognize us yet he can not talk because all the ‘machines things’(you name it) which was not my expertise to tell what was it. All of us are down playing it and aren’t really talking about it openly. We wait for an update by doctors..Several times his heart stop functioning and start gaining back his life after a few numbers of electric jump..we can't afford to see it..After a while, about almost 24 hours we've discussed and decided to let him go as he can not move anymore..we've spoke to the doctor, and the doctor had confirmed to pull out all the machine things from abah's body..We never stop to blow the Syahadah/ Yassin to his ears...i can't remove him from my own mind -pictures of him during his suffering....AT 2.00 a.m on 14th of July, he had drew his last breath with sound and safely....

p/s:i'll continue writing for july 2010-i can't bear more drops of water coming out from my eyes...i was crying!!!!..to be continued...
For the day of my father's funeral, at the early hours 6.00 a.m in the morning, we’ve decided to bury him at our hometown in Alor Star, Kedah. It was the beginning of our new journey which no more in Johor Bahru. Even with the every sadness and tears we've carried to move out from jay bee, we thought that the core reason for us to move back to Alor Star as all of our related families are all in Alor Star....Plus, we always celebrating Eid Mubarak back in A.S. Almost 25 years of my life live in Jay Bee...Far to go but yet close to the others. As people said, sometimes, we had to close the old book as more new books with better experiences to be explored.
We manage to get all the van, document and police report right before Subuh..Alhamdulillah...Abah had been prayed right after Subuh at the Surau in front of our house..We began to move to Kedah as early as we could as we hope to reach there before maghrib.
Again, God helps all of us..no tortures along the journey...we called for all the preparations at A.S before the funeral..we manage to reach at 3 p.m... and everything prepared...and a bed has been ready for him to be laid on..The house was surrounded by crowd of people..Too many!....It was the first time the house was full with people after several years of my grandfather died in 1992.
Several of my families, including me myself, had looked at father's face the moment before he been covered with white..we looked him as his face glowed as his early twenties and with the big smile as he always gave us and we know that happiness beaming from his face. Everything has over at almost 7 p.m with smooth and safely...Alhamdulillah....we had continued three days in a row for his 'doa selamat' and yassin.
Despite of the big lost i've experince in life, I think that deep down inside we all want to believe that death is not an end of life, but the beginning of something better. Life after the loss of father is never the same, but we all have to live through it at some point of our live and our life on this earthly plane continues.

August to December 2010-
Not much to write as Life goes on..but still, never be the same.. Just hopping of new days change to be a better life. As Abah had leaves his last say for us, which until now i carried all my life long..i believe i could transform my behaviours with it -

"Dalam hidup ni, tiada apa yang boleh bantu kita..tak ada satu pun atau apa2 pun yang akan bantu kita...Jagalah Solat....cuma Solat yang boleh bantu kita" -" Jangan mudah bersangka buruk pada ALLAH..setiap satu ada sebab"

Simple and meaningful of thoughts... InsyaALLAH...

What had happened to me through out the year, had propelled me to write. As must say I am ready to close that chapter. And I am quite enthused about beginning a new one entitled 2011. Who knows what a new year will bring? I am eager to grow and improve in areas that need attention in my life. I see things I could do better. I am well aware of my failures. There are mistakes I hope that I do not repeat...and, to 2010 - i am already miss it as it had gone with so many stories......